Something that is awesome: Yodeling. It's fun to listen to, and even more fun to do in the shower in the morning.
Something that is annoying: After watching the video, I'd have to say yodeling. And maybe David Hasselhoff.
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Giants
Something that is awesome: Manatees. They exist purely to be adorable and flatulent. When I was a little girl I took a trip to Florida and fed a manatee some lettuce out of my hand when it came to the dock to say hello. It was gentle and friendly and had eyes that seemed filled with actual emotion. We have not made the world a habitable place for these gentle giants, and manatees are killed and injured by boaters every day.
My heart belongs to a manatee.
Something that is annoying: When people fail to use there/their/they're correctly. God kills a kitten whenever these words are used incorrectly.
My heart belongs to a manatee.
Something that is annoying: When people fail to use there/their/they're correctly. God kills a kitten whenever these words are used incorrectly.
Friday, August 26, 2011
"Craptastic"
Something that is awesome: Air quotes. They are the best. Try using them at incorrect times: "So are we having a [air quote] meeting [air quote] today?" It freaks people out for some reason. Fun fact: in the US we use two fingers on each hand to scratch out our air quotes, since we mark speech in writing by using double quotation marks. In Ireland and England, where they use one quotation mark to indicate speech, they only use one finger on each hand for their air quotes.
Something that is annoying: This little jewel is our car:
Other fun features: the radio only works when there's a penny jammed into it, and the passenger seat doesn't lock into place completely. We lovingly refer to it as "the chair of death."
You are glad you are not me.
Something that is annoying: This little jewel is our car:
Other fun features: the radio only works when there's a penny jammed into it, and the passenger seat doesn't lock into place completely. We lovingly refer to it as "the chair of death."
You are glad you are not me.
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Boom
Something that is awesome: When I was 16 I drove an amazing 1987 Pontiac station wagon. It was a hatchback, which meant I could pile in a bunch of friends for assorted adventures. It had matching dents in its sides--one caused by me, the other by my sister, and both from early attempts at parking in a garage--that were like cute little dimples.
Something that is annoying: When a car catches on fire while you are driving it. Just like my 1987 Pontiac station wagon did.
Something that is annoying: When a car catches on fire while you are driving it. Just like my 1987 Pontiac station wagon did.
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Attention
Something that is awesome: Losing your short-term memory as you get older. At first glance this may seem like a negative thing. HOWEVER, when you do a ton of online shopping and then completely forget everything you ordered, the mailman might as well be Santa Claus.
Something that is annoying: When people post vague Facebook status updates that basically make it sound like there is a horrific tragedy occurring in their lives (e.g. "I'll make it through this." OR, "My life really sucks right now and I want to die."). Now, this in and of itself is not horribly annoying. It's when you approach the person with inquiries after his/her well-being (e.g. "Is everything ok?") and he/she fires back with "I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT," or "THAT'S A PRIVATE MATTER" that you kind of wish Facebook had a "punch user in face" feature right next to the "like" thumbs-up.*
*I would like to thank Shira for being my partner in annoyance.
Something that is annoying: When people post vague Facebook status updates that basically make it sound like there is a horrific tragedy occurring in their lives (e.g. "I'll make it through this." OR, "My life really sucks right now and I want to die."). Now, this in and of itself is not horribly annoying. It's when you approach the person with inquiries after his/her well-being (e.g. "Is everything ok?") and he/she fires back with "I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT," or "THAT'S A PRIVATE MATTER" that you kind of wish Facebook had a "punch user in face" feature right next to the "like" thumbs-up.*
*I would like to thank Shira for being my partner in annoyance.
Sweat
Something that is awesome: Kicking your own ass at the gym. Nothing is better than just going to TOWN on your body and sweating out all of the toxins while exorcising (exercising?) your demons.
Something that is annoying: When the woman next to you on the elliptical/treadmill/stationary bike is almost twice your age and still twice as fit as you are. You think to yourself, "I want to look like that when I'm 50," when really you want to look like that now.
Something that is annoying: When the woman next to you on the elliptical/treadmill/stationary bike is almost twice your age and still twice as fit as you are. You think to yourself, "I want to look like that when I'm 50," when really you want to look like that now.
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Classic
Something that is awesome: Mary Janes. They never go out of style, they are usually comfy, and you can wear them to work or out on the town.
I love you, Mary Jane.
Something that is annoying: When your inner ear itches. You can't get to it in any safe or reasonable way. I make a freaky pig noise with the back of my throat (a la Felix Unger) that seems to somehow relieve the itch. No one likes this noise. No one.
I love you, Mary Jane.
Something that is annoying: When your inner ear itches. You can't get to it in any safe or reasonable way. I make a freaky pig noise with the back of my throat (a la Felix Unger) that seems to somehow relieve the itch. No one likes this noise. No one.
Monday, August 22, 2011
Thunk!
Something that is awesome: Filing. Filing gives me warm fuzzy feelings. It feels productive, and it makes me happy knowing that everything in my life has a well-organized slot. I know that paper filing is slowly becoming obsolete now that our filing can all be done by computer, but the computer doesn't give you that satisfying THUNK that a full filing cabinet does when you close it.
Something that is annoying: Stepping into an empty elevator that is FILLED with the scent of someone's pungent perfume. No one should be allowed to wear SO MUCH PERFUME that it hangs in the air for several minutes after you have departed from a space. It makes me feel like I'm taking a bath in someone else's bathwater.
Something that is annoying: Stepping into an empty elevator that is FILLED with the scent of someone's pungent perfume. No one should be allowed to wear SO MUCH PERFUME that it hangs in the air for several minutes after you have departed from a space. It makes me feel like I'm taking a bath in someone else's bathwater.
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Slurp!
Something that is awesome: Irish donkeys. Seriously. Check this guy out:
Something that is annoying: When someone has about a few drops of Icee* in his/her cup and he/she keeps slurping. And slurping. And slurping. Dude....it's empty. Please stop. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.
*This can also apply to other beverages that contain ice. However, the slurping problem appears to be particularly bad with Icees. I partially blame the straw-spoon hybrid (stroon?).
Something that is annoying: When someone has about a few drops of Icee* in his/her cup and he/she keeps slurping. And slurping. And slurping. Dude....it's empty. Please stop. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.
*This can also apply to other beverages that contain ice. However, the slurping problem appears to be particularly bad with Icees. I partially blame the straw-spoon hybrid (stroon?).
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